Late summer greetings to all mods! If you’re in Pakistan right now, summer is not much to celebrate. It’s hot, it’s humid, it’s expensive, the only way to get through it is by wearing sleeveless - love and strength to the girls and gym bros who fight our noble cause every summer. I spent half the summer in Pakistan, and now I’m back in LA where summer is different. It’s still hot, it’s kinda humid, LA is always expensive but the experience of summer is so different here. You can wear shorts and walk around the block, buy an ice cream cone and go sit in the park alone. You can dream a little as you people watch, everyone is always happier in the summertime. I’m not saying someone won’t bother you. Someone might bother you! If you don’t have a car in LA and just walk around it can be a little risky but still, it’s not so much of an anomaly. I feel like just being in a public space is acceptable here, but your safety isn’t guaranteed. In that way it’s not so much different from Pakistan. Maybe the main difference is cultural expectation. Like baring your legs is such a cultural no go in Pakistan. Here, you can wear what you want and go wherever, but the risk is still entirely yours.
Okay this got dark very quickly and I apologise. I think I always carry some guilt or shame when I come back here after spending a period of time in Pakistan. Like why am I wearing summer dresses and taking the bus to go to the beach when these small joys are simply not an option for so many women I know? Which I then try to justify in this structural way by going well actually America and Pakistan are not that different. This is also a reaction to American media and it’s self mythologizing of America. Recently I’ve been watching - don’t laugh - Sisters and Secrethood: The Sozahdah Sisters which features ten(!) Afghan American sisters and all the drama. The narrative at the heart of the show is that this family ran from Afghanistan to America for their freedom, but of course still want to keep their cultural values intact. This is the whole underlying tension of the show. The way the sisters talk about America is so crazy. The land of the freedom and opportunity, where the sisters can technically wear whatever they want but cover up a little more in front of their mother (who represents Culture, obviously. mother as nation, mother as memory keeper, mother as archive, i could go on) Sure sure, I think to myself cynically while I binge watch and eat my trader joe’s chips, if America is the land of freedom then why are your bodies still the battleground upon which these freedoms are negotiated? Why do ideas of freedom in America always stop at personal choice? Do we have no collective responsibilities when it comes to freedom? One entire storyline in the show is dedicated to an unexpected pregnancy and miscarriage, with not a single mention of the abortion crisis in the country. Another storyline centers one of the sisters exploring her bisexuality and being afraid to tell her other sisters she’s seeing women. The woman she’s seeing is a war veteran who, get this, was deployed in AFGHANISTAN. It’s like??? You really can’t make this stuff up.
All this to say, I’ll still wear summer dresses but I think just maybe it’s important to feel a little uncomfortable while doing so. I can’t deny that even at the height of summer a little linen dress sometimes feels a bit heavy, it’s tied to so many other things for me as someone who didn’t grow up baring my arms or legs or even midriff. I don’t think the solution is necessarily my first guilt spurred reaction of like oh pakistan and america are not that different, or amreeka is actually a third world country huehuehue (a weak joke I make at parties way too often) but to remember that even ‘personal’ choices such as what you wear are never really just about individual freedom. The conversation simply cannot end there. Yes, you can exercise more individual freedom in America, maybe, but the cost of this freedom reverberates all over the world. So yes, on we rage.
In other news it’s a Barbie summer and pink is everyyyywhere. Even though I havent seen the movie yet, I did buy a swimsuit that was more orangey pink on the website and is actually just hardcore Barbie pink. But I’m into it. No need to go walking around like big cultural moments don’t impact you in anyway. An impossible feat. You just can’t escape! I mean, the way aesthetic ~ core ~ has taken over the cultural landscape in America is really something. I do feel a bit disconnected from Barbie because I wasn’t allowed to play with Barbies as a child. My parents didn’t think they were appropriate. Which to be honest I kind of get. When I would go over to a friend’s house and play with her Barbies, I never had a good time. Despite the many things Barbie could do - become a doctor or nurse, wear jeans or a glam dress, be single or with Ken - the stories were always so limited. Barbie was constrained by her body so the fantasy was also just so….not fun. Am I exposing myself as a cantankerous killjoy by saying this? I used to think we were over Barbie and viewed this only as a good thing, literally did not even realise there was a resurgence going on till a couple years ago when I babysat for one of my neighbours and her ten year old daughter had a black Barbie she was really into. Cute, I thought to myself then, but too little too late surely? Clearly not considering how well the movie is doing. It’s always a little awkward to me when my predictions are so off lol.
What’s really interesting is the impact of Barbie in Pakistan. In Punjab it’s been green lit for screening now that parts of it have been censored. In other parts of the country lots of young people came out in their best pink looks to watch. It just kind of warmed my heart in a way barbiecore and barbie themed parties really don’t in America. It’s nice to see young people - esp girls - enjoy things, go to the movies (since indian movies got banned, the joy of going to the cinema has also lessened considerably) wear pink, do something their parents probably wont understand, maybe sneak out to watch it because now that it’s been banned many patriarchs will disapprove. Uff there’s nothing like telling a little double story just to go and feast on a piece of culture. Get lost in the fantasy of something. Feed your heart, mind and soul! A lot to put on Mattel, I know. But sadly such is the world we are living in today, so we’ll take when we can get.
What else? A bit late to Discourse about it now perhaps, but I felt Velo sound station was so mediocre this year. Is it just me or was there not a single banger? Shamoon was ok if a bit boring, in his lane as usual. Young Stunners, a bit tired even for me and I’m a YS apologist. Meesha, weak lyricism. Aima Baig, needs to figure out her sound like ASAP. And that Atif Rozeo collab was painful. Atif, I’m sorry but this is so not your genre! Why are you trying to bop around with the youths? It’s not a good look. Although I do think Rozeo is showing his versatility - Ja Oye with Zoha Zuberi was fun and catchy, didn’t take itself too serious. It’s veryy telling how most of these artists make such great music on their own, but the minute a corporation wants to create a platform the quality of the music always suffers. Final thoughts: still excited for this resurgence of Pakistani music, just dont think Velo is allowing these artists to really grow and flourish creatively.
Also, I’ve decided to start a shout out section for this newsletter dedicated to stuff I’ve been reading/listening to/watching that I think is fantastic and share worthy. I don’t know what to call it yet, maybe a name will come to me soon. But if you’re looking for recs, or are just curious about what I’ve been obsessing over recently, then read on.
Reading: Sidra Kamran’s fascinating essay on how working class women in Pakistan are using TikTok, The Thermometer Broke! Digital Purdah, Class and Gender Trangressions on Pakistani TikTok. Sidra is doing some incredibly important work in her study of the intersections between work, gender and social class and this essay presents such a sophisticated analysis of how gender expression works on Pakistan TikTok. You can read the essay here
Also, Radius: A Story of Feminist Revolution, by Yasmin El Rifae. This is hands down the best text about the Arab Spring I’ve ever read. Yasmin El Rifae interviews the women who formed Opantish, a feminist group that intervened in cases of sexual violence happening at Tahrir Square during the final months of Egypt’s revolution. If you’re an organiser or believe in grassroots community work, you need to read this.
And, Jamhoor Media’s important new issue on the politics of Asia’s factory floors, featuring essays on Rana Plaza, The Homebased Women Workers Union in Sindh, South Asian labour in Britain’s fast fashion factories.
Watching: Lok Sujag’s podcast series, Hum Gunahgar Auratein, on Youtube. Fatima Razzaq is an amazing host, such a pleasure to listen to, and the guests so far have been amaze. Jalila Haider! Mukhtar Mai! Leena Ghani! The long form format gives each guest the time and space to lay out their feminist politic in a way that is so nuanced and textured. Watch here.
Listening to: this Baro Magazine playlist on repeat, especially while practicing yoga and during lazy mornings with a coffee. Personal fave: Tangerine - Channel Tres Remix
Ok! That’s all from my end for now. Wishing you all some ease and breezy moments wherever you are. Till next time xxx
I too feel so guilty about enjoying summer in the US, especially because the season is at best frustrating and at worst devastating back home. Loved your observations about the implications of Barbiemania in Pakistan!